715 Movies Like Parasite (2019) (Page 48)

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Not to be confused with James Cameron’s 1989 film, The Abyss isn’t the worst disaster film, but it could have been so much more. Inspired by the earthquake that actually happened in the real life town of Kiruna, there’s an important story here about worker safety, responsible mining, improving emergency protocols, and preserving the environment. However, like plenty of disaster movies, the film plays out in the most predictable ways, attaching a frankly irrelevant family drama that takes time away from the terrifying, claustrophobic nightmare that could have been. It does have decent effects, and even some decent scenes, but The Abyss is more interested in using the real life earthquake to manufacture drama, rather than actually looking into the manmade disaster.

Genre: Action, Drama, Thriller

Actor: Angela Kovács, Edvin Ryding, Felicia Truedsson, Göran Gillinger, Jakob Hultcrantz Hansson, Jakob Öhrman, Jonathan Fredriksson, Kardo Razzazi, Katarina Ewerlöf, Peter Franzén, Tintin Poggats Sarri, Tuva Novotny

Director: Richard Holm

Rating: R

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Bogged down by a platonic best friendship with a suspicious lack of communication and the repetitive use of tacky nicknames, Seasons never gains enough momentum to justify 108 minutes of uninteresting romance tropes. Carlo Aquino and Lovi Poe's chemistry is overshadowed by the glaring mound of unoriginal dialogue and drawn-out story. The lack of awareness and childish antics that culminate at the tail-end of a 15-year-long friendship are more disappointing than believable. With no external (or personal) struggles of their own, every sequence reinforces how flat and underdeveloped our leads are, as if they only engage with the world when close to, or thinking about, each other. Love-me/Love-me-not is never enough to carry the film.

Genre: Drama, Romance

Actor: Carlo Aquino, Christian Ty, Ivan Carapiet, Jolo Estrada, Lovi Poe, Ron Angeles, Sarah Edwards, Sheenly Gener

Director: Easy Ferrer

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Mae is a hopeless romantic looking for love and more clients for her custom t-shirts. After a meet-cute at the grocery store, she turns to an app called Missed Connections to find him. After they finally meet, Mae realizes he has a connection with someone else. Now determined to make him fall in love with her, she hires him to rebuild her website. As a rom-com, the comedy isn't particularly outstanding or noticeable. The romance, and Mae, are hard to root for, especially when her obsessions go too far, her slut-shaming goes unchecked, and it all lasts for 90% of the film without any real cathartic resolutions. 

Genre: Comedy, Drama, Romance

Actor: Chie Filomeno, JC Santos, Kelvin Miranda, Matet De Leon, Miles Ocampo

Director: Jelise Chung

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Whether you enjoy it or not, edgy, offensive comedy has become a legitimate style of its own—which means there's a way to get it right. Matt Rife has confidence and a decent range of tricks to keep his routines dynamic, but far too much of this set is spent simply pointing out different things and people who piss him off, for reasons that he doesn't articulate very well. Insults can be funny if they're cleverly written enough but Rife only ever sounds like he's trying to prove himself to his haters, not through his own creativity but by bragging that he has a Netflix special now. Even for comedians who like to punch down, you have to have some humility; anything less is just a drunken rant.

Genre: Comedy

Actor: Matt Rife

Director: Erik Griffin

Rating: R

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Given the nature of the subject (the discovery of a species that predates humans), this installment of the Unknown documentary movies has more fanfare than its predecessors. The narrative never transcends positing that a Homo Naledi is just like Homo Sapiens, but not really. The experts' enthusiasm is often unsettling when you quickly realize that no opposing view is mentioned. In other installments, the balance of arguments for and against discoveries made the narrative compelling. However, Cave of Bones is suspiciously wrapped in (and warped by) the need to have Homo Naledis feel different from humans. What is initially fascinating eventually lends itself to fatigue when discoveries and philosophized theories are repeatedly aggrandized. 

Genre: Documentary

Actor: Lee Berger

Director: Mark Mannucci

Rating: PG

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There is a clear and wide gap between what Maximum Truth wants to be and what it actually is. What it wants to be is a silly but smart sendup of right-wing activism and the rampant disinformation the movement propels. What it ends up being is an occasionally funny but mostly tiresome film that falls flat thanks to caricature performances and flimsy arguments that essentially work against the film's supposed ideals. In a self-contradictory twist, it actually helps the conservatives it claims to poke fun at by proving just how dumb liberal humor can be. The running gag about Rick being in the closet feels outdated at best and offensive at worst, while Simon being the typical airheaded jock does nothing to subvert the trope. It’s baffling that a film like this could come out in 2023; ultimately it just seems like a terrible waste of everyone’s time. 

Genre: Comedy

Actor: Andrew Friedman, Andrew Lopez, Beth Grant, Blake Anderson, Brandon Wardell, Brenda Koo, Brianna Baker, David Stassen, Dylan O'Brien, Ike Barinholtz, Ithamar Enriquez, Jena Friedman, Jon Barinholtz, Josh Meyers, Kelvin Yu, Kiernan Shipka, Mark Proksch, Matt Corboy, Max Minghella, Mia Serafino, Robert Belushi, Scott MacArthur, Seth Rogen, Sunil Narkar, Tiya Sircar

Director: David Stassen

Rating: R

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It's admirable how A Taste of Love keeps to the gentle pace of a slice-of-life story instead of blowing things up with unnecessary drama, but it's ultimately just too thinly drawn for any of its moments to become charming in their simplicity. There's nothing particularly wrong with any of its plot threads—emotionally they're all pretty level-headed and easy to understand—they just don't seem to coexist for any reason, or within any larger framework. As a result, spending time with this film doesn't just feel like hanging out with total strangers, but hanging out with people who are strangers to each other as well.

Genre: Comedy, Romance, TV Movie

Actor: Adam Hose, Ashley Dulaney, Darla Delgado, Demi Castro, Erin Cahill, Gina Yeena Salas, Jeremy King, Jesse Kove, Jim R. Coleman, Jody Pucello, Lily Jane, Martin Kove, Meghan Colleen Moroney, Rod Grant, Sasha Andreev, Steve Heinz, Susan Gallagher, Tymberlee Hill

Director: Conrad de la Torres III, Michael E. Brown

Rating: G

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An interesting premise quickly sputters out in Fool’s Paradise, writer-star Charlie Day’s misfire of a directorial debut. Day plays a down-and-out Charlie Chaplin-esque mute who happens to be a dead ringer for a difficult method actor (also Day) who’s stalling production on a Billy the Kid remake — and so he’s brought in by the movie’s producer (Ray Liotta) to star instead. 

The rest of Fool’s Paradise follows in this vein, as things just happen to Latte Pronto (as he comes to be named). There’s wry satirical potential in this set-up: a lot can be revealed about someone (in this case, the self-serving stars, agents, and directors of Hollywood) by what they project onto a blank slate like Latte. The problem, however, is twofold: Fool’s Paradise doesn’t have anything especially sharp to say about the biz — and, in the absence of clever or indeed funny writing, the film’s weak center is exposed. Day’s wordless performance is understated to a fatal degree; presumably designed to highlight the ridiculousness of the Hollywood players he’s surrounded by, it only shows up the weakness of the material and the unfocusedness of some of the key supporting performances. Maybe the movie would’ve fared better had some of its other characters been silent instead.

Genre: Comedy

Actor: Adrien Brody, Aixa Maldonado, Alanna Ubach, Allison Paige, Andre Hyland, Andrew Leeds, Andrew Santino, Artemis Pebdani, Austin Zajur, Benito Martinez, Brett Wagner, Charles Grisham, Charlie Day, Christine Horn, Common, David Hornsby, Dean Norris, Drew Droege, Edie Falco, Eliza Coleman, Eric VanArsdale, George Lopez, Glenn Howerton, Harry Yi, Helen Geller, Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis, Jeremy Chu, Jillian Bell, Jimmi Simpson, John Ales, John Malkovich, Julia Cho, June Carryl, Justin Jedlica, Kate Beckinsale, Katherine McNamara, Ken Jeong, Lance Barber, Leandra Terrazzano, Leonora Pitts, Lindsay Musil, Lisa Schwartz, Luvh Rakhe, Lyndon Smith, Marilyn Giacomazzi, Mary Elizabeth Ellis, Moses Storm, Peter MacKenzie, Ray Liotta, Ricky Wang, Robert Belushi, Romel de Silva, Roy Jenkins, Scott Allen Perry, Scott Pitts, Shane Paul McGhie, Steve Coulter, Steve DeCastro, Talia Tabin, Thomas Vu, Tom Beyer

Director: Charlie Day

Rating: R

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From the Ashes is based on the real life fire tragedy, but upon searching, Netflix hasn’t mentioned which exact fire it was talking about. It’s possibly inspired by the 2002 Mecca girls' school fire, with the strict all-girl’s school, the closed gates and unattended cigarette, but the film starts off with a disclaimer saying that the characters and certain aspects of the story are fictional. One would think, with the freedom the film granted itself through fiction, the film would dare to critique certain controversial aspects of the tragedy that needs to be talked about – like the implications of emergency services being hindered due to modesty, or whether the media speculation was fair, or even the lack of safety regulations that the school administration failed to implement. Instead, most of the film plays out like an investigation, seemingly placing blame on fictional students, you know, the victims, for being the reason one fictional student wasn’t able to escape. Sure, it’s all fiction, but this is just not right.

Genre: Drama, Thriller

Actor: Adwaa Fahad, Aisha Al Rifaie, Alshaima'a Tayeb, Darin Al Bayed, Khairia Abu Laban

Director: Khalid Fahad

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There is a germ of an idea here, and executed well, Sheroes had the potential to be camp and crude and unapologetically fun in the way only films about female friendship can be (see: Girls Trip, Booksmart, Bridesmaids). Instead, with what looks like a negative production budget and zero commitment from the cast, the resulting film is unwatchably bad. The needle drops are excessive, the cinematography is straight out of a stock image site (what a waste of Thailand’s vibrant beauty!), and the acting, if you can call it that, is wholly unbelievable, with perhaps Isabelle Fuhrman and Skai Jackson standing out as the only exceptions. The chemistry of these so-called friends feels canned, making their montages of supposed fun look stiff and stilted. We’re supposed to believe these girls who can’t even hug right are friends? They’re out here dipping in the pool and sipping beers while thinking of ways to save their tied-up-in-the-middle-of-nowhere friend, so again I ask, we’re supposed to believe they're best friends? Let’s be real, because this film surely isn’t.

Genre: Action, Adventure, Comedy, Crime

Actor: Isabelle Fuhrman, Jack Kesy, Joseph Angelo, Kelly B. Jones, Prinya Intachai, Sahajak Boonthanakit, Sasha Luss, Skai Jackson, Wallis Day

Director: Jordan Gertner

Rating: R

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